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→Overcoming Social Discomfort
It is best to rehearse what you'll say with a new person or in a new situation. The more you rehearse, the less nervous you'll be -- which means you'll be more, not less, relaxed and spontaneous.
It is best to rehearse what you'll say with a new person or in a new situation. The more you rehearse, the less nervous you'll be -- which means you'll be more, not less, relaxed and spontaneous.
如果有时间，可以先预想一下即将发生的对话，可以让自己更放松。
=== Personal questions ===
When trying to get a conversation started or continue, ask questions that are '''a little bit personal''' and that cannot be answered with one or two words. It's okay to pry a little. Most people '''love to talk about themselves''' and will '''like your interest and slight boldness'''.
不要害怕问题太私人了。大部分我问得出的问题都应该是人们能够接受的，甚至是希望你去问的。
=== Self-disclosure ===
Self-disclosure is important if your goal is to '''feel some connection and not just pass the time'''. Be sure to '''ask for the other's opinion, too, of course.
交流的形式之一：我分享一个点，并问你的观点。或者可以先问，等别人回答之后再分享自己的观点。
=== Sharing flaws ===
To deepen a conversation or make it more interesting to both of you, sometimes it works to share your own flaws or problems -- but with some cautions.
But there is also something nice in admitting to your human nature if you can convey that you still feel good about yourself. (My favorite line from Captain Picard of ''Star Trek: The Next Generation'' is, "I have made some ''fine'' mistakes in my life." It is so humble, wise, and self-confident, all at once.) Certainly if the other person has revealed something painful or embarrassing, it will deepen the conversation considerably if you do the same.
展现自己的缺点是可以加深一段对话的，只要注意不要刚认识就不停说自己的缺点。在说出缺点之后也可以说说自己对这个缺点的看法，自己是否已经接受，等等。
== 其它摘抄 ==
== 其它摘抄 ==